Soft Girl Summer.
She’s cute.
She’s curated.
She’s lighting incense, whispering affirmations, her lips glossed, her skin hinting of lavender.
And while everyone’s reposting her energy like gospel, I’m watching from a different seat.
Because what’s trending right now, I’ve been living for decades.
Only I didn’t call it soft.
I called it necessary.
Hard-won.
Sacred.
And I didn’t arrive here by lighting a candle and taking a nap.
I arrived here by walking through fire.
Hey Sis, I Get It
I understand the pull of Soft Girl Summer.
After years of being the strong one, the do-it-all one, the emotionally bulletproof one…
A woman thirsts for softness like water in the desert.
So yes—let’s rest.
Let’s feel.
Let’s reclaim joy and drop the hustle.
But let’s also get real.
Softness without depth is costume.
And far too many of us are dressing our wounds in silk robes and calling it healing.
Lived Wisdom Over Pretty Language
I don’t speak from theory.
I speak from over 100,000 hours of self-mastery.
From 35 years on stage as a professional performer and music coach—learning presence, expression, and most importantly, surrender.
From 10 years as a transformational specialist.
From 8 years of coaching real people through the YourDay Balance Game.
From mothering a blended family of 3.
From surviving two custody battles with the same man—and gaining full custody without stepping into a courtroom.
I’ve lived love.
I’ve lived loss.
I’ve lived in between.
So when I talk about softness, I don’t mean an Instagram filter.
I mean the kind you earn.
The kind that comes after you’ve been cracked open and still chose love.
The kind that speaks your truth, even with a shaking voice.
Softness Is Not Performance—It’s Practice
There’s a flavor of “soft” out there that looks more like escapism than embodiment.
It’s hyper-curated. Emotionally passive. Spiritually ungrounded.
True softness?
It’s not for the faint of heart.
It’s:
- Honoring your own guidelines when it would be easier to abandon them
- Letting people go who were never meant to stay
- Listening to your body when she says stop
- Choosing presence when performance feels safer
- Loving yourself even when it makes others uncomfortable
And doing all of that… without becoming hard.
For the Women Coming Up—And the Ones Holding the Line
I see you—the younger women exploring softness like a new language.
Reaching for healing tools your mothers didn’t know how to use, and your grandmothers could only dream of.
Choosing rest, reclaiming sensuality, questioning systems that don’t honor your right to choose.
That matters. It’s real. And it’s a powerful beginning.
And to the women who’ve been in the trenches for years—
Raising families, holding spiritual ground, facing themselves over and over in the quiet?
I honor you.
You’ve carried the torch, and the world is brighter for it.
No matter where you are on this path, know this:
Softness evolves. And so do we.
You Want a Soft Girl Summer?
Have it.
Just know that’s not where the deep work ends.
This isn’t about age—it’s about access.
You can be 25 or 55 and still ask:
“Am I truly soft with myself—or just avoiding myself beautifully?”
Because the real work happens beneath the aesthetic.
In the tension.
In the pause between what happens and how we choose to respond.
In the silence you don’t try to fill.
In the space you finally give yourself to feel what’s real.
Here’s What Softness Looks Like for Me
💛 Choosing understanding over ego
💛 Tracking my habits because I honor myself
💛 Speaking the truth even when I’m the only one ready to hear it
💛 Laughing at what used to break me
💛 Trusting the process—even when I don’t get to control it
💛 Practicing spiritual principles, not just posting about them
💛 Saying “yes” to love without saying “no” to me
This isn’t a trend.
This is a tool.
This is a practice.
Tools for a Soft Woman Summer
If you’re serious about softness—not just as an aesthetic, but as a way of being—then your body must be part of the conversation.
That means we breathe.
We cleanse.
We choose practices that bring us back to ourselves, moment by moment.
Here are a few powerful habits I practice and recommend inside the YourDay Balance Game to support softness as a spiritual practice:
BREATHE Habits
- 3 Conscious Breaths – Before responding to a text, before opening your mouth in a heated moment, before making a decision—pause and breathe. Softness lives in the space between what happens and how we choose to respond.
- Ujjayi Breathing – This oceanic, warming breath soothes your system from the inside out. It’s like hugging your nervous system.
- Wim Hof Breathing – When your energy feels scattered or your emotions are swirling, this breath rebalances and reminds you of your elegant power.
CLEANSE Habits
- Speak Your Truth – Holding back your truth hardens you. Softness requires honesty. Whether it’s in a journal or out loud, let it out.
- Crying Without Judgment – Not just shedding tears, but allowing them. Let the release be sacred. Let it cleanse you.
- Digital Detox (PM) – Softness needs stillness. Cut off screens before bed and let your spirit settle.
- One Room Reset – Clearing physical space clears energetic space. Pick one room, one drawer, one corner—make it sacred again.
Softness isn’t passive.
It’s an active return to the body, to breath, to truth.
And these habits? They’re anchors.
They keep you rooted when the world wants you to perform.
Final Word from a Soft Woman in Her Prime
I am fully available to soften.
I receive Life’s beauty as a reflection of my attunement.
I walk a lifestyle that honors softness as sacred.
I lead myself through healing with presence, patience, and principle.
Because less is more—and I embody that in word, breath, and being.
And softness, when sourced from the soul, is power.The power to change for the better.
The power to remember your sovereignty.
The kind of power you were born to return to.
